Monday, September 14, 2020

What if? Revisited

Recently a friend and I were reminiscing about a difficult season of life when the enemy wanted to keep me tied up in knots about all the "what if" questions in life.

In my case, they were questions connected with my situation. This was during the time my husband had became disabled and I became the primary breadwinner. 

  • What if I can't make enough money?
  • What if my husband passes away and I'm left to raise my girls on my own?
  • What if things never get better?
You know ... all the biggies.

I shared how one day while driving and wrestling these thoughts in my mind, John 10:10 came to my mind - especially the last part:

"I am come that they might have life, and that they have it more abundantly."

I told my friend how somehow, in that moment, I just knew God wanted me to be happy. Life was not doom and gloom. Somehow He was going to bring me joy in the midst of the struggle.

Abundant living is not that we never think, "What if," but it's knowing "Who" is in charge if something happens.

And it's not me!

So, all these years later, I am here to tell you those "what if" questions never happened. 

I can also tell you despite some pretty big set-backs, I'm a pretty happy camper.

But ... I do remember a "what if" that didn't end the way I wanted. Here's a part of a blogpost I wrote some years back:

Which is worse - fear or regrets?

Most fears never happen. Most regrets could have been avoided.

It's been about 23 years since Granny's last words to me. 

With a worried look, she sighed, "I'm just afraid this is the last time I'll ever see you! What if I don't come back from this trip to Florida?"

I hope I didn't roll my eyes, but if I didn't on the outside, I certainly did on the inside. I'm sure it showed when I said, "Granny! Of course, you'll see me again. Where's your faith? If not here, you'll see me again in Heaven."

All these years later, I wish I had taken extra time to love on her and reassure her gently instead of so impatiently.

I'd had a lifetime of hearing what all the worst-case scenarios could be. I didn’t think one of them would actually happen.

She did get sick during those months in Florida and never came home, despite the fact 99% of what she had feared during her life never happened.

100% of my regrets did happen.

I wanted her to have more faith. She probably wanted me to have more compassion.

There are no do-overs on this journey. But there can be learning experiences to make the travel more rewarding. I'm hoping to see each encounter with a traveler as important, realizing there is no guarantee they will ever pass my way again.


What about you? Do you regret any last words? Take time NOW to let every traveler you meet hear only the best from you.

[adapted from an earlier post]


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  1. That is a sobering story about your grammy. Even as we trust our days to Him....we do not want to take them for granted. It is a good reminder for me today. Thanks -

  2. I don't think I can remember if I have parting words I regret. I'm glad that your what if's didn't materialize. It is good that we have heaven to look forward to.

  3. Jerralea, such a sobering story to remind us of the preciousness of each day. Goodbyes are not something which come easily to me which makes me. I am so grateful that one day we will no longer need to say goodbye as we will be reunited and together for all eternity.


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